Archive for September, 2009

hiatus (2).

I typo’d that title as “Siatus”. Sigh-atus.

During the past six months, I have

  • been back off and back on the sugar-wagon many times. Currently off, but it’s only been about 5 days.
  • started taking higher and higher doses of sertraline (Zoloft) because it stopped being effective. Several times.
  • decided to stop taking sertraline because it was getting fucking ridiculous.
  • started taking Cymbalta. Loved it.
  • stopped having obsessive thoughts about when my next sugar fix was going to be.
  • started having obsessive thoughts about when my next sugar fix was going to be.
  • started taking a higher dose of Cymbalta. Loved it.
  • stopped having obsessive thoughts about when my next sugar fix was going to be.
  • started having obsessive thoughts about when my next sugar fix was going to be.
  • started taking a higher dose of Cymbalta. Loved it. (see where this is going?)
  • realized that I was on an anti-depressant and I was still very fucking depressed.
  • stopped taking the Cymbalta.
  • put my doctor in a half-nelson until she gave me a scrip for Wellbutrin.

We’ll see how well this works. I am fairly confident that it will do great for the depression, but I’m not sure how well it’ll do for the food. Luckily, I got a nice reboot in the last week: Critter brought home a sweet little 24-hour flu, so I’ve barely eaten anything in the past 5 days, let alone sugar.

Oh, and I’ve started jogging. I’m not actually sure that you can call it “jogging”, however, because I’m not actually sure that both of my feet are completely off the ground at once at any point during my stride. So it’s kind of a jog-walk. But you know what? It gets my heart rate up higher than walking does and it looks like jogging (although nobody actually sees me because I wait until it’s dark outside) and I feel good about it, so who cares?

I’ve gotten up to jogging 3/4 of a mile, which was my 2-block-by-2-block route, and now I need to do a longer route. I’m probably not going to do that until I feel a bit better, though. I’m still dealing with vertigo from Cymbalta withdrawal and fatigue from being sick (and from Cymbalta withdrawal. And from insomnia from Wellbutrin acclimation. Oh yeah, and from getting up 15 million times in the night every night the past week from some combination of me/Sean/Critter being sick, Critter teething, or whatever. Oy).

Back on track soon. I can see the track from here, at least.

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